Don't take this all very serious, K?

Why is it that I couldn't cheer you up the other night...instead of just smiling and trying to enjoy our last little bit of time together you...sighed, complained, bitched, moaned, and more or less ignored me. Even on the way home, and I know you didn't want your dad there, but you wouldn't even talk to me, you just let me ramble and look like an idiot...and i sure do feel like one. Do you just like it when i dote on you? I get that but you wouldn't even crack a smile...and you barely even talked to me, answered me, anything. I don't get how that kind of shit works... Why is it that if i spend all night trying to get you to smile and just...enjoy my company, but if i happened to be bummed and wasn't cheering up fast enough you'd not only take it personally but then you'd get depressed and that'd make me feel bad so the attention would be back on you... I kinda feel like you don't...I dunno, like you don't like my company anymore or something. I know stuff can get stale or boring, but i love every moment i'm with you, even when we're doing nothing at all. And you say you have an empty space when i can't entertain you or we're not out shooting or something...and I'm always trying to make you smile and laugh but i can't do it if you don't want to. And I guess you didn't notice and I don't blame you for that...but i dressed up for you all weekend, everyday...I wore cute things, i played with me hair and did different stuff...and other than when we were alone...you didn't look at me. I'm not jealous but I just feel like maybe...I dunno, seems like you only talk about doing stuff with me when you're away and whenever you're here...i dunno what i wanna say, i just...I'm sorry. Now I feel bad...